Olympics: everyone got their lucky eggs?

I got an email recently from the Olympic committee with news about my ticket - yes, I managed to get one in the second draw. There was whooping and general giddiness. No, I do not have tickets for the women’s beach volleyball. (I really do hope that event will live up to the hype – for some reason it’s the event everyone's been talking about. Are people aware they won’t be participating in string bikinis? And that Horse Guards parade will not magically be transformed into a Brazilian beach).

If I remember rightly I get to watch women’s basketball and, even more intriguingly, Judo. I'm not a fan of either sport – my first choices were actually gymnastics, diving and ping pong – but I am over-the-moon delirious at being able to watch the Olympics!

I’m not even British but I feel some sort of national pride that it’s being held in London. I tell people that ‘we’ are hosting the Olympics this year. People raise their eyebrows at my decidedly un-British accent and nod slowly trying to figure out what exactly is going on.

But just in case my enthusiasm wanes as the days grow nearer I've made a list of Olympic resolutions:

1. I will not mind the inevitable travel chaos in central London.
2. I will put up with non-stop sport on every TV channel for a few weeks.
3. I will not get annoyed with excessive screening of the women’s volleyball (poor men’s volleyball, I hope they get equal coverage).
4. I will not make any jokes about curling*.
5. I will not put on a Jamaican accent when watching the bobsledding*.
6. I will refrain from taking up archery, weight-lifting or Taekwondo until a few months after the games are over and I have perspective once again.

And to help with explaining to little people why the Olympics are so important (and make out I know everything) I will be investing in this book:

Promising to inform us about 'Records and reputations, cheats and champs, victors and venues' I think that sounds just the thing for me to page through during the volleyball. 

*I am reminded these are actually Winter Olympic sports - silly me.